december.

Its that time of year again, $hristm-er i mean Christmas.

now, we all know what we do during christmas, we watch movies, “What” your saying “What about the presents?”, well you're a infidel! Because christmas is to celebrate the birth of jesus, were the three wise men give jesus dvds for “citizen kane” “the seventh seal” and “That one disney documentory were they made lemmings fall off a cliff”, but dvd players were not invented yet, so the massage was lost on baby jesus. and of course, we watched Christmas movies during Christmas, like tron.

Tron is perhaps the best geek movie ever*, It is set in dark distopia future of 1982, and is about the big lebowski whos a video game designer for some reason, who attempts corporate espionage by breaking in to the company that stole his games, but gets zapped by a ray gun that takes him in to THE INTERNET.

WARNING SPOILERS!

actually, he goes into cyberspace, BUT THATS THE SAME RIGHT?

ANd in cyberspace everyone plays games like “laser discs” “light cycle” and “pac-man”

all of which would make great video games in real life (and they did)

and then he finds love

and then he goes back home in a futurama tube.

BUT NOT WITHOUT SCREAMING A LOT.

the end

But seriously, tron is a great movie, and has aged well! It has awesome effeicts and is fun to watch, and it had a sequel many years later. it may be somewhat over dramatic at some parts, but thats part of the fun, also it feels like a fucking video game.

(in fact, the director got the idea for it from seeing pong for the first time, also he only made four movies. and is only known for tron)

Also, it has something to do with christmas, one character compares the main character (played by the big lebowski) to santa claus (“this guys like santa claus!”) when opens the biggest door in the universe. So yeah.

It is also the reason why theres a toy story, it was one of the first movies to use computer effects, but it was never really recognized during its time for this, but then its fanbase grow large enfoe, that disney decided to make a sequel.

9/10

the sequel, which was called Tron legacy, was made 28 years later

THe son of the big lebowski, who is NOT played by shia lebeouf (Great move), tries to find his father, and does so by playing a arcade game.

BUT THEN

he gets sucked into cyberspace.

Oh NO, things are looking grim for our non-shia lebeouf hero, BUT THEN, SUDDENLY, OUT OF NO WHERE...

WARRING SPOILERs

HE MEETS DAFT PUNK

AND A CYBER PIMP

AND A HOT CHICK

AND CGI FACE BIG LEBOWSKI

AND FLESH FACE AND OLD BIG LEBOWSKI

and then he brings the hot chick home using his non shia labeouf.

also the big lebowski blows himself up twice

the end.

I would talk for a while about the movie and how good it was (or how bad), but, i’m just going to say it was good because it didn’t have shia labeouf play the young character like in the terrible wall street sequel.

so a nine it goes.

9/10 (propally more of a 8 however)

*expit for the empire strikes back blade runner alien star trek two

But before that i saw the wolverine, But instead of reviewing it, here two questions to ask people who hadn’t seen the movie yet, but want to one day, or people who have seen the movie, these two questions:

Motorcycles?

What is a ninja’s worse weakness?

5/10

and i also saw kick ass 2 with dad.

i have nothing to say about it other than that it was not as good as the first.

6/10

after those two, i also saw elsume with dad, elsme is a movie by the same guy who made destrict nine, one of the few movies that i give 9.5 aliens relseming slaves out of 10. and it follows the theme created by district nine, political proplum with sci-fi thing, last time it was aparhine with aliens, this time it is free heal care with robots.

alos one cuplant about district nine was that the third act was more acton based than the rest of the movie, which was just drama. the director decides to respond to that criticism by making the entire movie action, making it matt damon vs rich people on the ring from halo.

yeah, they ripped off halo.

the bad rich people are on a ring that's also a planet with life, and the halo from halo is a ring with life on it like a planet!

Fun fact: peter jackson and neill blomkamp were going to make a halo movie, but then they made district nine instead, and they blomkamp made elsume. which ripped off halo. those fuckers.

7/10

ALSO, while dad was sleeping and mom was getting drunk with friends, i had time to watch could atlas alone.

i have no idea what happened in the movie.

actually, that sounds like what mom said when she got back home “i don’t know what's going on”. oh god i just figured it out.

its a movie about being drunk and not knowing what happened afterwards. wachowskis, you are geniuses.

bad jokes aside, i’m going watch the movie again one day, so i can know what's going on.

8?/10

And finally, i watched blade runner with my dad (which i saw before could altas, but still, i’m putting it afterwards in this post just cause...i worte about this last.), pesfcly the final cut which was what the movie wans meant to be but then they added in a happy ending, narration, and cut out a horse scene.

So the final cut is clearly the better movie.

but yeah its blade runner what more do i need to say? other than the unfunny han solo killing robots joke, also i can’t believe that this movie was a failure at the box office, especially since every cyberpunk thing ever is inspired by this movie.

10/10

and with my mom and dad i saw “the way way back”,Your average teen comedy film. expit its your average indie movie instead, whatever, its a movie about a depressed teen, that should tell you what its about.

anyways, it was a good movie, and a funny one.

wow, those sure were insightful comments, were they? it was good, and funny. not even a why, just “this is good, see it now”.

The new roger Ebert, passing through.

8.5/10

and those are the movies i saw in December.

and now, the boring part where i talk about what happened in my life, prever to get your poileros, and remember all of this stuff, because you were probably there during these events because the only people who read this blog are my family and friends:

Me and my dad have been doing this thing where we write something  at the same time on Thursdays and Tuesdays, but that's too personal for this public blog in my opinion.

also my friend trey came over to my house to hang out, actually, his mom came over to hang out, and brought trey with her.

uuuuum.....

And roleplaying, if you have been reading this blog for a while you will know that i play roleplaying games with my friends, so in a recent adventure, we freed a evil old sorcer, whoes soul was trapped for thousnd of years, and is one of the most powerfulles sorcerer in the multiverse, and in the process putting one of their friends soul in two daggers, while he (cran liret) was put in their friends body. thus bring back a Great evil to the world.

And he give them rewards for doing so!

All in all, a fun time, right?

and also....

*Tumbleweeds rolling by*

....

So, Have a merry Christmas tomorrow (or today) everybody!

also...i saw little miss sunshine.

which is a cute, charming and funny movie, with great acting, and the movie that made steve carell famous (he also appeared in the way way back, see what i mean?), also i watched it with my mom who has seen the movie like 5 times, also i conster it a arnold schwarzenegger movie becuase its inspired by a saying by Arnold which is “If there's one thing in this world I hate, it's losers. I despise them”, so yeah, put it by predator and commando.

10/10 (seriously, this is a awesome movie).

Heres another movie me and mom watched in october that i forgot to mention because i was lazy.

....that wasn’t horror.

(so pretend it's halloween)

Taxi Driver.

The reason why this movie is so good is because of how subtly creepy it is. The Creepiness of the main “hero”, The lack of good guys, the blood and violence, the irony of the ending and...The fact the title sounds like a cheesy horror movie if you replace the cover. By that i’m not saying its awesome because of the volcence, i’m saying that ultimate theme of...People being terrible human beings? (I’m not god at analysis....) is done well. One could say its commdery on potilcs, but....actally, yeah i kind of does......but my point is is that the movie is prehpes one of the best expemlers of a anti-hero in movies ever. And horror movies, because Robert de Niro is fucking scary.

According to the Book of Spookiness:

And Thou Creepiest monsters in the world shall be Dracula, Frankenstein's Monster, And Robert de Niro

-Book of Spookiness 2:4

So yeah, taxi driver is a influence on Many great directors, one of the best of martin scorsese’s career (of course, his career is well known for being good.), and one of the best films of all time, see it. or robert de niro will kill you in your sleep.

Also my mom liked it.

Anyone who dares to call Frankenstein’s Monster by its creator’s name, will be punished by Stoning, Burning, and Being Spooked Beyond the Normal Maximum of Spooks a Person Can Withstand, Setting The World Record in How Much Someone Has Been Spooked Before.

2spooky4pagans

-Book of Spookiness 3:5

november

no post in november about what happened in november, how ironic, so to make up for it, i will make a-er, post about november. What happened? we went to a island.

we went on a boat trip to the island (duh), it was on the canadian bay, so we went through the border of Canada (man that sounds cool for such a boring thing, its like canada is another universe, not that it isn’t already, but hey, its canada)-Oh and by the way, despite this blog being around for a few years, i should point out that despite being born to american parents, and living in america, i’m actually dual citizenship, so i’m half canadian. anyways, we went on a boat, and then to another boat, to saturna island. by the way, i like going on boat trips, its a good feeling to relax while on sea and look at the great water, such a nice feeling. also the boat had to park by a few other islands because it had some other stuff to do, like have a shipping truck come on to the island of “which no one knows its true name because i don’t remember its name. So there”. and then we went on saturna island.

saturna island was a nice place we thought. the house we rented for the 3 days was styled like a old 1800s house, but it was built in the 90s, so it was not hunted. however, the bath tub outside of the house was a replacement of another one that a long time ago had a man die in it, but a shaman was called to drive away the spirit of the dead man afterwards, and then the hottub was replaced, so...ex-hunted i guess*.

if i ever made a website that was a catalog of house that are available for rent, i would have a check box on the profiles for houses for “hunted”, and every house would ether be “haunted” “not haunted” “ex-haunted” “not haunted, but the monkey who we keep in the attic thinks hes a real boy”, and “please pay our taxes”.

anyways, the house had a pool table, dart board, and an shuffle board, and there haven’t been any haunted shuffleboard movies that i know of, and that's for the best.

and there was a cd player too, i have nothing else to say other than, we listened to music, maybe stuff that was actually a ritual used for causing Satan to appear, who we had to fight and we did and we won by causing him to slip over a banana peel. But it wasn’t haunted, so no.

OK, that's enough of the house. it was really boring to write about, lets talk about the island. i don’t want to write a review of the house.

the island itself is a community island, with a population of 200, its a nice little island on the Canadian bay, and it is nice to know that everyone probably knows everyone, and that-

-ok, i am writing a review here, so if you want to know more about this place, just look it up on wikipedia or something.

so i guess i’ll try to talk about stuff we did now......um...well we drove around the island in our car and looked at all of the places, the island was suprisely smart and so the trip was short, the island had a house over looking the sea, a church, some animals and stuff, do you want to experience this? then look up sartana island on google street view, and have your mom and dad talk about something while looking at it, if you can’t get to talk about stuff? then make them get into a fight by bringing up something they used to fight about, which will cause you to have post-traumatic flashbacks to when your dad hit you, because your a 55 years old abuse victim and not me. sucks to be you.

and we also had no internet at the island, which you think would cause me to do a comedic “oh no there's no internet i’m going craaaaaazy” scene from a terrible comedy, but no. I had fun with my family instead. sorry you didn’t have good parents, 55 year old.

NOTE: IF your not 55 years old and had horrible parents, then you were the attended audience of that joke, if i offended any actual abuse victims, then i guess i’ll cancel my comedy movie about a Vietnam vet going back in time to Vietnam. sorry. but seriously, sorry.

in the house, there was a library that was just one cramped room with shelves on each of the walls, we could not read the books however, as we could not find the light switch, which made it mysterious, and then we founded the light switch, it was in one of the shelves, mystery solved. and we took a look at some of the books, i looked at harry potter and the deathly hollows and found the end of the book which said “the scar had not bothered him for seventeen years” dad found a book with a entry about two nazis fighting in boiling water and one of them put the others head in the water drowning him, but was boiled by the water, killing both of them. we made jokes about it for the rest of the day.

and then after 3 days, we went back on a boat to home, also dad smoked some weed with a canadian on the trip back, cause yeah. it was fun. not the weed part, i mean the boat part.

*assuming that the story wasn’t a lie to make people come to the house.

also, thanksgiving, we ate food, and then a day later i played risk with dad, i won, also i was playing as australia. and then we went to my friend treys house and had another thanksgiving there. then in early December trey stayed over at my house for 3 days, he also bought skyrim, and he played as a khajiit, a white one because he likes white tigers for some weird reason. and then we brought him back like a infected child, so there. we also got the chance to play risk with him, i won once, and then he won once.

and that's it for November, it was more interesting in person. but hey, i’m stuck with this blog happily anyways, so whatever.

bye.

Also i’m going to try to work more on the wiki.

bye.