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so, the last blog was the way it was, for a while, and then i was all like “HOLY SHIT I’VE GOT TO POST IT” and i stayed up late turning it into what it is now, also it was made on a day were my friend david came over.

it was fun i guess. and now on to the blog!

first off Halloween.

now, normally halloween is a fun time for me, i look forward to it every year, as i scare people on the yearly haunted house.

but this one....................................................................................................................................
....sigh, ,just sigh.

it was THE WORST HALLOWEEN EVER! oh sure david and other people were there, but i ruined it for myself, argh, and i feel bad for my self.

but the worst part is that it was a bad day for me, but not to any other person at it, making it worse.

i really do not want to talk about it, it was that bad.

don’t mention it around me, for the love of god.

i guess i’ll try again next year.

(god, that sounds like something calvin from calvin and hobbes would say)

but anyways, on a more happy note (because no one wants to read me being emo.), me, Cameron, David, Cameron brother, odin and wolfgang, went to see the seattle pacific science center's exhibit on king tut!

(no, i didn’t get a curse)

it was fun, i guess.

and then came thanksgiving and paul come over for that and that happened and, yeah.

OK, that was a lame blog to spend a week or two (i lost count.) o-

WAIT, I GOT IT.

my friend david has a very massive fear (yes fear, let me repeat that VERY MASSIVE FEAR) of......

SUPERMAN 64!

yes, superman 64, one of the worst games ever, the one that had you flying through mazes, which were a LINEAR path of rings.

the one that took place in a virtual world. due to “political reasons”.

well it does make since, it IS a shitty game, so maybe it is justified.

so because of that, i’m gonna do a review of it! ENJOY!:
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SUPERMAN 64

“then theres no time to waste!”

those are the words that repeat in many fools who tried to play superman 64, one of the most enduring weapons made by the french, ever.

achly, how about THE most enduring weapon by the french, ever!

which strange construing the frenchs track listing, but whatever, this is about SUPERMAN 64, NOT THE FRENCH!

but anyways. this game, no doubt made by the french as a weapon against the american capitalist pigs, "epic" story goes like this, there was a french game making company called titus who wanted to make a game based on the cartoon “superman the animated series”.

but then warner brothers TOOK THE GAME AND WIPED THEIR ASS WITH IT.

ok it wasn’t that dramatic, but basically titus got pissed and turned this into a weapon of mass destruction on the americans for ruining their game.

a bit of a overreaction guys.

AND NOW THE GAME ITSELF

first off the plot.

lex luthor, the only man in the dc universe who has the superpower of the most sumgest (and punchable) face around, has trapped supermans friends, jimmy, lois, and some professor guy, in THE MATRIX, WHY? because of political reasons (no really), or lex has just seen the matrix and thought “hey that sounds like a good idea!” (good thing this game was made before the sequels, then there would be a rave level, and the game would be a few hours longer.).

so, superman has to go into the matrix and save his friends. why?

CAUSE THERES NO TIME TO WASTE!

no really, there isn't anytime to go golfing, so he has to go save his friends.

AND NOW THE FIRST LEVEL!

i asked three guys to play the first level and record their reactions, i am now wanted for torture btw.

the first is a man who, if he gets angry, he goes on a rampage.

so this is the first level, huh. thought a maze was a non linear building, not a LINEAR TRAIL OF RINGS, huh. looks like the dictionary has to change the definition.

man, was this a racing game at first, or is this lazy programming. cause superman moves like a car, achly, i think they did a good job at simulating a car, huh, maybe this game was orgarly, supercar 64, but then came the americans.

those damn americans, they have then nothing good. i mean its not like america keeps on busting on in unexpected moments and saving the day at the last minute and- HEY

is this game one level? cause this is getting boring

ok so far so good and [DATA EXPUNGED, what you missed should not be posted online.]


man i should have warned him of getting stuck in walls. by that i mean in superman 64, not in real life, cause he didn’t get stuck in a wall, he did go on a rampage however.

test result: 10 people dead from super man 64 caused rampage. 5 walls broken. a car whacked in car chase. one bad game.
could not get past first level, but proved that punching a N64 does not fix bad games, nor does it fix glitches in video games
result was the same as the playtesting as superman 64.
rating: d- (nice job causing a car crash!)

anyways heres the second experiment.

he is a pimp that was promised a orgy.
too bad it is superman 64.
not the game to play for a orgy

where's the orgy i was promised?

anyways, i was brought here to have a or-WOW SUPERMAN IS FLYING Through VAGINAS, HOLD ON I HAVE TO DO THIS [DATA EXPUNGED]

aww man lex wins, damn, i known that i should not have ma[DATA EXPUNGED], damn you freud.

never ask a pimp who knows his freud to play superman 64.

that was a rare sentences.

(think god i put him in jail for, no kidding this is on his crime record, ma[DATA EXPUNGED] to superman 64. wtf is wrong with me)

result: pimp put in jail, or being.... ewwwww.
could not get past first level.
rating:ewwwwwwww

final experiment is some guy who likes saying “ok why “

ok why am i flying through rings.

ok why am i trying save to guys from a car.

OW OK WHY did that car EXPLODE?

oh fuck lex won.

ok well i guess i’ll press start to quit.

afterwards tested on the “ok why” guy to see if superman 64 works well as a bomb, yep it does!

ok why are you-[DATA EXPUNGED]

result: could not get past first level, its official, there is only one level. god, the french is lazy!
rating: ok why/10


things i learned today: 1.in case of emergency, do not punch the N64, nore punch a carge of superman 64. 2. do not ask a pimp to play superman 64 (no wait, don’t ask anyone to play superman 64) 3. superman 64 is good for bomb making.

4. superman 64 is only one level long. sad.

the ending.

so superman's saved his friends and, LEX IS STILL IN THE REAL WORLD!

wow, so this is THE MATRIX.

oh and btw for those wondering, if i beat the game or not, no i just looked up the ending on youtube.

result:i am now wanted for making people play superman 64, and blowing a guy with a bomb.
a bit of a over reaction guys.


FINAL SCORE

frenchness: 0.0
it stars a american created character.
fun: ok really?
its only if you turn it into bomb.
supermanness: you have to be a superdick in order to like this game
superdickry: 0.0
superman never does anything dicky, oh wait you mean the guys who made this game?
10.10
fucking french, first napoleon, and now this!
longness: 1.0
its just one level, right?
final score: F-

-see me in detention SUPERMAN 64!


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god, no wonder david hates this game so much.

hmm what's else?

oh yeah, now that christmas is coming, i will post my christmas list.

books for christmas (all are rpg books):

*Cthulhu by gaslight

*delta green countdown

*weep

*postmodern magick/satosphere (if you can find it)

*to go/break now (if don’t get satosphere and to go)/postmodern magic (if get satosphere, but not to go)

*book of manor

*book of battle

*land of giants

*the grey knight/tournament of dreams

*and me no longer being on Americas most wanted list for the crime of superdickery.

OK see you soon!